I Missed My Exit (Poetry)

I thought I missed my exit, that I would live to regret it
But that’s just the way it seems, when you’re chasing your dreams.
The voices trying to dictate my direction, not the least interested in my protection.
Loud, pushy, discontent, anxious – like a withdrawing drug fiend – just trying to get another spike of dopamine.
I thought I knew it all, there wouldn’t be any chance of short fall, in this self serving mission, on myself the spot lights of attention, lead to some really selfish decisions.
Base on my own goals, what I thought would satisfy my soul.
All the spoils of life oh so seductive, and in their pursuit, how it could be oh so destructive.
Blinded by desire and vanity, I walked on within my own insanity.

I thought I missed my exit, my future unbeget.
But little did I know, how my life would go, when I woke up to meet Jesus, the one who frees us.
I didn’t understand what true love could do to a man, until salvation was found, with both my knees on the ground.

I’m far from perfect, no self righteous verdict.
I still catch my self begging for grace when life has it’s foot on my face,
But at the same time I can be so unforgiving when it’s my victory I’m spinning,
So thankful I’m no longer judged by how well I measured up, saved by faith in the One who accepted His cup.
Hope is knowing the future is greater than your present situation. Faith, the substance that fuels our deviation, from death into life – the new creation.
His righteousness is the gift, that keeps me off of that cliff.

So thankful I missed my exit.

Lord, I’m thankful for this plan, the details of which are beyond my range to see.
But I do understand, its to testify to your grace and mercy.

I’m thankful for being a dad, to a wonderful son, it was never a plan that I had. Raising a life and getting to watch him grow, brought me a love and joy I never thought I’d know.

I’m thankful for my brother, born of the same mother.
Now brothers of the cross, born again, and sent out as a pair, with the Gospel to declare.

I’m thankful for fellowship, and loving friendships.
I’d felt alone, my heart as cold as stone, it calloused my soul to the very bone.

Do I have regrets? Things I wish I could forget?
Situations I think I could have done better? Wishing I was more clever, a redo of each endeavor?
Yes I do, but if I did a proper review, I’d be in the same place with the same queue.
My lesson hadn’t been learned, because I had yet to be burned.
Whether from my decisions, or from someone else’s mission, you can’t be dismiss’n, experience comes from trying, and a lot of times miss’n.
See what God taught me, things may no have gone according to my plan, but here I am, just a man, on His stage, devoid of my former rage, speaking God’s praise.
I never asked to be a writer, or a poetry reciter.
I just wanted to be able to reach out to people like you, sharing the good news.
I’m thankful for my life in Christ and thankful to be His device.
If He was willing to save and use a man like me,
He’s willing do it for everyone I see.