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One of the unique aspects to Christianity that separates it from religions is the fact that you enter into a personal relationship with Yahweh, the creator of all things. You have direct access to the true Living God. Our access is via our prayer life. We don’t need to visit a priest of human mediator to talk to God. That is what prayer is. Communication between man and God. We can approach the Father in the name of the Son Jesus, via the power of the Holy Spirit that lives inside every Christian. Prayer is a holy communion and an opportunity to talk to and interact with our heavenly Father. It is one of the key foundations to a healthy relationship with God. Any healthy relationship needs open communication. Our walk with God is no different.

I believe one of the biggest issues with prayer these days is the increasing influence instant gratification has on our lives. We’re in the age of text messaging and online interactions. We want a response now and we don’t have the patience to wait around for it. It needs to be what we want to hear when we want to hear it. A Christians’ prayer life isn’t always that way. I’d more often than not it’s an act of patience. God’s answer will come, in His time, and in His way. It may or may not be the answer we want to hear, but it will be the answer we need to hear. Our Father in heaven has our best interests in mind. We may not understand that in the moment, but He provides and denies things to us out of His goodness. If we do not have our trust squarely in His omniscient and loving nature, we will allow our selfish nature to drive a wall between our relationship. Our Father wants us to reach out to Him in all of our situations. Scripture tells us this time and time again. ¹⁶Rejoice always; ¹⁷pray without ceasing; ¹⁸in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Jesus Christ (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18). Another example. ⁴Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice! ⁵Let your gentle spirit be know to the all men. The Lord is near. ⁶Be anxious for nothing, but with everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be known to God. ⁷And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:4-7). I remember a specific time in my life when I was pouring myself out to God with so many questions. I’d been a Christian for a few years and what I was seeing in the church was very frustrating to me. I was reading my bible and the scriptures I were reading were not evident in the lives of the people I was around. We’re supposed to be Christ centered. Servants to the God Almighty to help spread His word of salvation to others. We help bring into the fold the lost and lonely souls that do not know Jesus. Just as Jesus told the parable of the shepherd who would leave the 99 to go find the 1 missing sheep. What I was seeing in the church was a group of people more interested in gaining status within the church, as an organization. The people I talked to gave no acknowledge of Christ moving in their lives. It was one accomplishment after another with no glory given to the Lord. It was more important to push the name of the church I was attending over the gospel of Jesus Christ. It had gotten to point where shirts were being made that stated “I love my Church.” There was very little mention of Jesus in all of this activity. This all lead me to stop attending church for 6 – 12 months. It all made no sense to me. Adding fuel to the fire, my job was getting increasingly more stressful. The plant I worked at was over loaded with work. A lot better than having no work for sure, but it brought on another set of issues. We were several months behind on orders, and our customers were of course angry. I was one of the primary contacts between production and our customers. So I had to deal with a lot it personally. To add to this, I’ll was taking care of a lot of responsibilities of one of our salesman. Dennis was usually a couple weeks late when following up on customer related issues, so I was the one filling the gap. Well, one day my manager came in and I was talking to him about the enter situation and trying to get some solutions figured out to our problems. My manager’s solution was to lie to our customers about our situation. This was the tipping point for me. As he walked out of the door, I remember thinking to myself, that’s it man. I’m done. I’m going to quit. This is insane. No one gives a crap about what is going on here. Well enter God’s timing. My phone rings, and I answer it. It’s the last person I wanted to talk at that moment in time. Salesman Dennis. He was calling to ask me about a customer order. He stops and asks me if I have time to hear a story about something that just happened to him. In my head I’m screaming, no freaking way man, I don’t have time for this, crap, but I said sure. I was like, did I just say that? Anyway, Dennis starts telling me about his daughter’s childhood friend Devon. Turns out Devon became transgender while at college and came over to his house for the holidays. The entire time I’m like what does this have to do with anything? Well that’s when he said, “As a Christian….” I had no idea he was a brother in Christ. I’d never thought to ask or ever talked about it. Anyway, he goes on to say that he’s known Devon since she was a little girl. Devon grew up with his daughter. He’s always loved Devon like a daughter as well. Now Devon had transitioned, there were a lot of Christians saying to him how could he put up with that? Dennis went on to talk to me about areas in the Bible where Jesus calls us to seek our the lowly and lost. How he came for the sick and not the self righteous. How Jesus ate with the sinners and outcasts. How the angels appeared to the lowliest people in their society, they shepherds. As a Christian Dennis is called to love everyone, even his enemies. He told me how he still loved Devon as he would a daughter, and based on what the Holy Spirit taught him, he should be. He doesn’t condone the lifestyle, but he can still love the person. It was like a bomb went off in my head. All of the scriptures he went through were the ones that I was asking God about. As His word tells us one thing, and people are acting in complete contrast to it. After that call all the stress, anxiety, and anger I had about my situation vanished. Lisa, our administrative assistant shared an office with me. She looked at me and saw the tears in my eyes. She asked me what happened? I told her, I can’t believe it. God used Dennis, the last person I would have wanted to talk to right now, to answer every prayer I’ve been asking Him about for the past 6-8 months. I went about my duties at work with a completely different perspective. I rejoiced in my relationship with the Lord. His presence gave me the patience and desire to endure the situations at work. He’d always been there, for sure, but I was letting my frustrations and perspective get in the way of me enjoying His presence.

God’s timing in answering prayer is amazing. Like any relationship, it is up to us to keep our hearts in a condition to hear from the Lord. ¹⁵O Lord, open my lips, that my mouth may declare Your praise. ¹⁶For you do not delight in sacrifice, otherwise I would give it; You are not pleased with burnt offering. ¹⁷The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise (Psalms 51-15-17). The saving grace of the gospel keeps us humble. It keeps our hearts in a state of grateful longing. We will desire to be in presence of God, and will seek Him out. We do this not only in our prayer life but also by reading the bible, the word of God. John 17 is a prayer from Jesus to the Father praying for His disciples and giving thanks to God for being able to fulfil the will of God on earth. Jesus talks about how the Son and Father are one, and how Jesus’ disciples are also so one in the Father and Son through the name of Jesus. Jesus, doesn’t stop there, He also includes the unity through the Holy Spirit to all that will believe through the gospel that will be proclaimed to the world. ¹³ But now I come to You; and these things I speak in the world so that they may have My joy made full in themselves. ¹⁴ I have given them Your word; and the world has hated them, because they are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. ¹⁵ I do not ask You to take them out of the world, but keep them from the evil one. ¹⁶ They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world. ¹⁷ Sanctify them on the truth; Your word is truth. ¹⁸ As You sent Me into the world, I also have sent them into the world. ¹⁹ For their sakes I sanctify Myself, they they themselves also may be sanctified in truth. ²⁰ “I do not as on behalf of these alone, but for those also who believe in Me through their word; ²¹ that they may all be one; even as You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be in Us, so the the world may believe that You send Me” (John 17: 13-21 NASB1995). We are brought into a union with of Father, Son, and Holy Spirit through our salvation. This gives us access to God through Jesus Christ, maintained by the Holy Spirit. This is reinforce in Matthew 8 when Jesus was approached my a centurion, a Roman military commander. ⁵ And when Jesus entered Capernaum, a centurion came to Him, imploring Him, ⁶ and saying, “Lord, my servant is lying paralyzed at home, fearfully tormented.” ⁷ Jesus *said to him, “I will come and heal him.” ⁸ But the centurion said, “Lord, I am not worthy for You to come under my roof, but just say the word, and my servant will be healed. ⁹ For I also am a man under authority, with soldiers under me; and I say to this one, ‘Go!’ and he goes, and to another, ‘Come!’ and he comes, and to my slave, ‘Do this!’ and he does it.” ¹⁰ Now when Jesus heard this, He marveled and said to those who were following, “Truly I say to you, I have not found such great faith with anyone in Israel. ¹¹ I say to you that many will come from east and west, and recline at the table with Abraham, Isaac and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven; ¹² but the sons of the kingdom will be cast out into the outer darkness; in that place there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.” ¹³ And Jesus said to the centurion, “Go; it shall be done for you as you have believed.” And the servant was healed that very moment (Matthew 8″ 5-13 NASB1995). This exchange shows the hierarchy of prayer. We pray to the Father, in the name of Jesus, and the answers of the Father are given to Jesus, our high priest, and communicated or carried out to us or whoever is the recipient of that prayer by the Holy Spirit. Through this relation with the Father through Jesus, how awesome is it to be able to prayer for the needs of others and know that our prayers and petitions will be heard by our Father in heaven! It is because of this that I include a written prayer and the end of each chapter. A prayer that people can pray to God in the name of Jesus. When we pray to God for others, we can ask for His mercy and His compassion to be poured out for others. How wonderous and glorious the God we serve. As Paul taught in his letter to the Thessalonians, ¹⁴ We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone. ¹⁵ See that no one repays another with evil for evil, but always seek after that which is good for one another and for all people. ¹⁶ Rejoice always; ¹⁷ pray without ceasing; ¹⁸ in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1Thessalonians 14-18 NASB1995). We can pray to God on behalf of all people. We can approach God with praise and petitions always. What a great way to reach out to people that we may not even be in touch with, or that we may not even know. Someone broken down on the highway, or even that person that was driving like a maniac. A prayer for the safety of that driver and the people around them. As Christians we have opportunities to reach people for Christ every moment of every day through our prayer life.

Prayer is not only about asking God for things. Prayer is our path of communication with our Father. He is a good Father. As Jesus told us, none are good expect Father God. Christianity is a relationship with God through the death and resurrection of Jesus the Christ. Our love and trust in Christ humbles our heart to the presence of the Lord. There are times the Holy Spirit will direct us to pray. it maybe for someone else, or God may want to teach us about Himself. When the Lord asks us to pray, we need to be obedient to his requests, no matter the circumstance. No matter how silly it may seem at the time. I was living with a friend of mine after I moved back from New York, shortly after I was saved. Jake was out of town visiting family one weekend, 2-3 hours away. I don’t remember exactly what I was doing, but I went into the garage looking for something. As I walked into the garage I closed the door from the kitchen behind me, and locked myself out of the house. Not really sure how I did that either, but so it goes. I figured I’d walk over to the neighbors and see if they had a spare key. There wasn’t much else I could do that that point, my phone and everything was inside. Jake wasn’t due back home until the next day. So I knocked on the neighbor’s door, but no one answered. It was night time, I don’t remember the exact time, so I figured they must be in bed. I walked back into the garage and closed the bay door and say down on the weight lifting bench trying to figure out what I could do. That’s when I heard the voice in my head say, pray. I thought to myself, pray? Prayer isn’t going to magically open this door, but ok fine I’ll pray. So I prayed “Heavenly Father I don’t want to be stuck in this garage all night. Can you please let me in the house? If not, no big deal, I can just sleep on this weight bench tonight. In Jesus name, Amen”. As soon I finished my prayer I thought to myself, “I bet Amaha will be awake now, I can just sleep on his couch”. So I went back to my neighbor’s house and knocked on the door again. To my surprise no one answered, so much for that prayer. So I went back into the garage, and sat back down on the weight bench, coming to terms with sleeping in the garage for the night. It wasn’t ten or fitteen minutes later that Jake pulled into the driveway. It blew me away. Jake decided to come home early, unbeknownst to me. This wasn’t some kind of miracle. Jake wasn’t instantaneously transported back home because of my prayer. My obedience in prayer allowed God to show something about Himself. God is with us always through the presence of the Holy Spirit. This situation was to teach me that. No matter how small the situation may be God is with us. He sees what we are going through, and He cares about us as His children. God knew Jake was coming home when I locked myself out. Sure, He could have just let things roll along, staying silent and just letting them work out, but He choose to let me experience His relationship with me in that situation to increase my trust and dependence on Him. I had a part to play in this relationship. I had a choice in that moment, I could have chose not to pray. I could have dismissed the request, but thankfully I was obedient, and received the blessing of learning something about Father God in the process.

My prayer for this chapter will be sharing a prayer a friend of mine shared with me years ago. Talking about being obedient to what God is asking us to do in our prayer lives, I feel that this prayer is the perfect fit to this chapter. Kristen wrote this prayer while on a plane flying out of town for business. She sent me a screen shot of it via text. She said she wasn’t sure why, but she felt God was telling her to share it with me. I don’t even remember if writing down a prayer was something she normally did, but this prayer was exactly want I needed at that time in my life. I was praying to God about areas of my life that seemed out of my control, and I needed reminding of what God taught me in that garage. Kristen’s obedience in prayer brought peace to my anxiety. One, knowing that I wasn’t the only person struggling with the issue. Two, that God was gracious in asking someone to be an answer to my prayer in my time of need. I am hoping through this book that same blessing can reach even more people.

“¹Therefore there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. ²For the law of the Spirit of Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death, ³For what the Law could not do, weak as it was through the flesh, God did: sending His own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and as an offering for sin, He condemned sin in the flesh, ⁴so that the requirement of the Law might be fulfilled in us, who do not walk according to the flesh but according to the Spirit, ⁹…you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you… ¹⁰If Christ is in you, though the body is dead because of sin, yet the spirit is alive because of righteousness, ¹¹But if the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you. ¹²So then, brethren, we are under obligation, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh- ¹³for if you are living according to the flesh, you must die, but if by the Spirit you are putting to death the deeds of the body, you will live. ¹⁴For all who are being led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. ¹⁵For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out. “Abba! Father!” ¹⁶The Spirit Himself testifies with our spirit that we are children of God, ¹⁷and if children, heirs also, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him so that we may also be glorified with Him” (Romans 8: 1-4,9-17).

Life with Christ is not an easy life. We are reborn by the Holy Spirit on the inside, while wrapped in the same sinful flesh of this world. Our hope is in our future as children of God. We long and look forward to when we will be united with our Father in eternity. When all of the fallen world will be cast aside when Christ comes again, and we will be remade in His imagine sinless and rid of the lusts of the flesh. This is the struggle. The duality of walking in the Spirit of Christ and battling with the temptations of the flesh. Thanks be to God Jesus over came all temptation we will ever face. Through our faith in his life, death, and resurrection God has poured out grace on us and sees the righteousness of Christ, not our sinful state. With our hope in this promise from God, how do we deal with the struggles of the flesh now? I believe this is the toughest question facing Christians. This is where so many get side tracked and how the imagine of the Christian life gets destroyed by outsiders looking in. As Christians we have the greatest gift in all of history to help us deal with the temptations of world. The presence of the Holy Spirit and the gospel – the good news of Jesus the Christ. The message of hope and redemption through faith and repentance. The most powerful news headline ever! And so many churches and preachers these days are replacing this message with story-filled self motivating sermons devoid of the life saving, Christian strengthening, word of God. As Christians we must keep the gospel at the fore front of our minds and never forget where we came from. We are all sinners saved by grace. Be grateful for what God had done for us!

I remember what you did for me.
I was completely clueless
I had no inclination to be saved.
I had no idea I even needed saving
I thought being raised in a religious home was enough
Yet You gave me the greatest gift possible…salvation through faith in Jesus Christ.
I was and never will be deserving of such a gift
It changed my life forever
It will forever be a reminder and my catalyst to a humble and contrite heart
IF I can keep my eyes on You and not the selfish desires of my flesh….
Thank you Jesus for the grace You pour out for me every day!
Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Forever and ever AMEN!

Proverbs 19:3
A person’s own folly leads to their ruin, yet their heart rages against the Lord.

Contentment. A word we all seek after. A word that can be extremely elusive. Once caught, its seems to slip away almost as quickly. What makes contentment so slippery? Why can’t we hang on to it? Reread Proverbs 19:3. The world teaches us to chase the desires of our heart and go find true happiness. Oh don’t worry, happiness is different for everyone, you’ll find yours some day. When you do you’ll be content in the life you’re living. Or will you? What makes us happy one day may not be the same thing that makes us happy next week or month or 5 years from now.

Often times during my writing process, I sit down to type out these chapters, but I can’t make any progress. I have my notes done, but it’s like staring at a blank wall. I’ve always thought about why that is. I’ve thought about the term writer’s block, or it being poor motivation, but these don’t fit the situation. Trust me, I wanted to be done with this book already. I wanted to be done with this book years ago, but no matter how much I try to push through it, I find myself crawling along. Sometimes it is after I’ve gotten through the introduction paragraph. Some times it is smack dap in the middle of a chapter. I’ve had to go back, delete, and rewrite entire chapters because they just weren’t right. I’m constantly learning as I write this. The Holy Spirit is growing me through every experience. This chapter on contentment another such lesson. It’s one thing to try to write about something from an external perspective. Its entirely different when you’ve been given the task of writing about something you are learning internally. When I stall in my writing process, it is because I am trying to write the chapter from the wrong perspective. This book is my testimony to what God has taught and brought me through. It is one thing to know about something. It it a completely different thing to learn and internalize it, to make it a part of who you are. I’ve mediated on this chapter for a while now. I’m constantly turning it over in my head and talking to God about it. That is a key part to my learning process. What I had to learn and internalize before I could write this chapter is gratitude. The level of gratitude toward someone who saved my life. Living a life grateful for the gift of salvation. The grace and mercy of the gospel present in my life every day. When I wrote the first draft of this chapter, it felt incomplete. Like I was missing something. Sure enough I was. I was missing the part were God was trying to expose my sin of lust. I just talked about internalizing over knowing. Well my fist approach was in a state of knowing. Yes I got the importance of grateful heart, but there was more, hidden by denial. Through what he was teaching my brother and a sermon from a pastor at a church Scott was leading worship at, the Holy Spirit put the screws on me once again. As result of that I came to realize is my desire for a lazy, passive, and self indulgent life style. I’ll get into those details later, but the punch in my gut was while writing a chapter on contentment in Christ, the Holy Spirit showed me how I’d become content in my sin.

There are so many different messages out there for finding contentment. What it comes down to is what does your relationship with God through Jesus Christ look like? Do you truly believe? The bible makes it pretty simple. Jesus told us himself “³³‘But seek first the kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. ³⁴So do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own'” (Matthew 6:33-34). Verse 34 is rarely discussed when verse 33 is quoted. Jesus tells us that our days will have troubles. So a trouble free life is not a life of contentment. This passage is usually preached as a way to mislead people into thinking we’ll get what we want if we just follow God. This is in fact a very lustful interpretation of scripture. Going into a situation expecting God to give you what you want. Self centered and self serving. It’s a trap we easily fall into. Such was the situation if found my self in a couple years ago. The company I worked for, Praxair, was closing the Charlotte plant where I worked. It was of course completely unexpected. I went through the usual process of God what will I do, I can’t loose my job and all that. After a short time of woe is me, I of course began to ask God what the plan was? The men’s group I had been attending for the past several years was breaking up. It seemed to me that things where coming to a transitional phase in my life. After telling a former coworker of the closing, she told me she could probably get me a great job in TX as a shipping manager. I had never considered moving at that point, but I figured I’ll see what happens. It did put a thought in my head though. God could be calling me to somewhere else. That shipping job never panned out, but I was offered a transfer within Praxair to Houston, TX. I began to warm up to the possibility of moving. I had spoken with my former coworker several times, and this is where the lust of the flesh can sneak in. I had always been interested in a possible relationship with her, but never considered it would be something to pursue, so I figured if I moved, may be things could workout, but most of all I needed a job and this was an easy opportunity. So I moved, with the hope in the back of my mind that maybe God was sending me there to find a good relationship with a woman I was interested in. My expectations were that I would be getting exactly what I wanted. This was not the case. The relationship never panned out. It didn’t even really lead to a friendship. It did lead into a lot self inflicted stress and disappointment, but God had a better plan to work out. When I got to Houston one of the first things I realized was that I needed a church to go to. I prayed for God to lead me to a church, which He did, and very quickly. Within a couple weeks one of the maintenance guys at my apartment complex invited me to church. It took me suffering through a week of a busted shower, in the middle of a HOT Texas August, but God has a way of helping you appreciate His timing. So I slowly began try to settle into my new city life. To keep this story as short as possible, the the church I was lead to was teaching some heretical celestial courts doctrine and, needless, to say I did not attend their services for very long. I did however join a small group they introduced me to early on. I had a lot of things in common with the couple leading the group, and they were followers of Jesus. We listened to the same apologists and read several of the same books. Though as time went on they did begin to become more and more influenced by the leadership of this church. I enjoyed the friendships I made in that group and whenever possible I would redirect the focus on reading from the bible and following the word of God. I would eventually leave the group as the influence from church’s leadership and doctrine become more and more ingrained in the small group’s teachings. The leader of the small group did direct me to a great bible believing church when I told them I was leaving. This taught me that even those of us who are born again can be mislead by false teaching. Something Peter and Paul constantly warned about. There was one couple that ended up leaving that church and the group as well, as they realized the teachings of the church they attended were not following the truth and teachings of Jesus. The church was teaching yet another prosperity and wealth reward system. Feeding on the lusts of people to gain prominence and wealth as a church. After almost a year in Houston, it was announced that Praxair was going to close their Houston plant as well. Yes I know, I was like what the crap, again? As with everything in this life we live, God was 100 steps a head of me. I was offered a new job back in Charlotte through a former manager of mine, and I got to move back home! My stay in Houston was the catalyst for this chapter. God started to teach me about contentment while I was there. I learned about how my expectations will affect my level of contentment. If I am constantly seeking out how God will serve me and reward me as I move through life, I can quickly become unappreciative of my relationship with Him. It will become a very selfish and one sided relationship. Very unhealthy, and driven by the my lustful desires. I learned not to get caught up in my disappointments. Our expectations of getting what we want may not be met by God’s plan, but as we pursue those things, we need to pay attention to the opportunities to serve. The couple that left the church was very grateful for my presence there. As they began to read their bibles, the Holy Spirit revealed to them the folly in the teaching of that church. The husband was a new Christian, and he was very grateful that he did not get caught up in such heretical teachings. How great and wonderful of a God we serve! I mean, look at everything that had to transpire for God to drop a man into a small group just to help two faithful Christians receive reinforcement of their faith and the truth of God’s word. Before I got there the wife of that couple was becoming more and more uncomfortable with the practices of that church. God was faithful to reveal the truth to them. Even though I was hoping for a particular outcome from my move to Houston, while I was there, I was still listening to the Holy Spirit lead me along. I kept my faith in the word of God, and made sure to keep it at the center of my perspective. Measuring all things against it in the proper context of scripture.

Houston was a prime example of what God constantly asks me. Do I trust Him? When things are not going how I planned it, do I still believe that God is in control? Granted some times I’m so focused on what I want, I do not hear his voice. It can take time and a lot of frustration until i do. Do I trust in the fact that He is God, and no one but Him knows how things need to transpire to accomplish His will? His will to bring as many people into a relationship with Him as possible. God calls us to be a holy people. “¹⁴As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance, ¹⁵but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior, ¹⁶because it is written, ‘YOU SHALL BE HOLY, FOR I AM HOLY'” (1 Peter 1 :14-16). Lust places my happiness over God’s holiness. It puts me at the center of the relationship, when my relationship should be Christ centered. Lust is one of the most destructive forces in any relationship. It is completely self serving, self centered, and lacks any of the fruits of the spirit. It is a completely flesh stratifying way to live. Lust is about taking for yourself only, to use the other person, people or thing to fill your selfish desires until we’ve had our fill. Which you’ll come to find out that those desire cannot fill us. So, we cast them to the side and move on to do it again. Our relationship with God can become like that. The prosperity gospel approaches God the same way. As if He is someone to serve our whims and desires. Lust leaves us empty, and it empties the other person we feed on of their self worth. It leaves them to seek and fall victim to another person’s lustfulness. These desires cannot fill us. It leaves us unsatisfied, cold, and slaves to our fleshly cravings. Lust is not just sexual. It stems from all of our desires. It could be the work alcoholic, who consumes themselves with work just to squeeze our every possible ounce of success and sense of accomplishment at the expense of their coworkers or family members. Fame, fortune, money, drugs, etc. can all be the the self-centered motivation to take and take and take until we’ve ruined all the relationships we have and the people we had them with. This can happen in friendships as well. If they don’t feed your need for attention, you move on to find another group to feed off of. Lust is everywhere, in everyone. God warned us that we should not covet our neighbors’ possessions. Not just the material, but the spiritual, emotional, and psychological as well.

I believe the easiest place to see the effect lust has on relationships is divorce. Statics have the US divorce rate close to 50%. Christian homes are not excluded in this number. As Christians, marriage is supposed to be a relationship that reflects Christ’s love for us. Jesus constantly compared the relationship between Himself and the church as a marriage. Relationships centered on Christ are relationships of contentment. When a man and woman follow Christ together love abounds. When we are not following Christ at the center of the relationship, lust can creep in and lead to self-centeredness. If not identified and dwelt with quickly, it’ll lead to the destruction of the relationship. Having things in common is different then making them the center of your world. Look how many marriages are failing once the children leave the home. Marriages should not be child centered institutions. What you build your relationship on is what will be needed to maintain it through out its life. If its money, work, children, recreation, etc., once that is gone where is they foundation? Society has replaced biblical love with lust. Romance is a good and fun thing, right? But what does the bible say love is? ⁴“Love is patient, love is kind and it is not arrogant, ⁵does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account wrong suffered, ⁶does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; ⁷bears all things; believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things” (1 Cor 13:4-6). This biblical definition of love sounds a lot like what Paul was writing in the section of Romans I have quoted in the beginning of this chapter. It sounds a lot like walking in the fruits of the Spirit. Paul specifically defines the fruits of the Spirit. ²²“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, ²³gentleness, self-control; against such things is no law. ²⁴Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passion and desires. ²⁵If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Sprit. ²⁶Let us not become boastful, challenging one another, envying one another” (Galatians 5: 22-26). These things sound great, but it is definitely the hardest part about the Christian walk. Why is that? Because we forget our first love. Christ. A statement Jesus makes against the the church at Ephesus in Revelations 2:4. This happened to me, even as I wrote this chapter. I’ve been very selfish in my relationship with God. My prayer life has been reduced to just moments in passing through my day. I stopped taking time out of my day to spend with God. I wasn’t reading scripture out side of what was in my notes. Instead I consumed my time with activities and leisure. Just as I did when I was married. My ex-wife and I had a very self centered relationship. Each of us had expectations of what the other would fulfill in each others lives, without taking any of the responsibilities for it. That did not translate well into our marriage. Each of us expected the other to take care of things. Communication was near zero between us, and it only took about a year before we called it quits and separated. We finalized the divorce about a year or so after that. This was years before I became a Christian, but the same approach affects my relationship with God. God has a purpose for us all. “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:10). Just like a healthy relationship, we cannot sit ideally buy and expect God to take of everything. We must keep out path of communication open through prayer and reading His word. If not we’ll become consumed with ourselves. When I turn my focus on my desires, and put them before what God is calling me to do, it causes anxiety and frustration. Of course at first it couldn’t be my fault, right? I see the faults in everyone else around me. I found myself criticizing the sermons at church. I’d watch people doing what God has called them to do. All the while I was being a lazy bum with what God has given me to do. Eventually I stopped attending my regular church services, and the bible study too. Discontentment was my friend now. Now I could spend even more of my time in leisure. Avoiding my responsibilities. It truly is a relationship between us and God. He doesn’t want a bunch of little robots mindlessly doing what he wants, he wants it done in love. Just like the warning Jesus gave the church in Ephesus. “Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken the love you had at first” (Rev 2:4). I had begun to take for granted what Jesus did for me. I forget that there is no love outside of Christ. I forgot the depravity of my sin, and the price that was paid to give me the grace and righteousness of God. I forget how grateful I should be to God our Father, for the mercy poured out to me. Love is a choice. Look at how love is described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-6 that I quoted earlier. Each and everyone of those actions have nothing to do with the individual. They are outward expressions of a choice we have to make. Will I choose to be patient toward someone else? Will I choose to not hold a grudge? Will I choose to rejoice in the truth? A heart of stone cannot love. That is why when we received the gift of salvation, God gives a new heart, and we have to choose to walk in the Spirit, not in the flesh. It’s a process to learn all of this. It is called sanctification, and it is why we must never forget the gospel. When we forget that, we begin the walk into lust. We take our eyes off of Christ, and stop sharing that same grace to those around us. It is so easy to go about our lives and get lost in the rat race that is the world. I always think about the Israelites as they went through the desert. God lead them by a pillar of fire and a pillar of clouds, yet these people still took for granted and were ungrateful for what God had done for them. How much more do we need to be on our guard ourselves from the lure of lust in our lives? Just as in the parable of the strong man. The Holy Spirit cleans us out. If we are not walking in the Spirit, the lusts of the flesh with come back, and like the parable, come back in force. It is our responsibility to maintain our part of the relationship. Relationships require interaction. God is always there, always available to us through Jesus Christ. If we do not keep Him in the center of our lives, we will quickly find something else that will lead us astray.

Contentment comes from knowing and walking with God. Letting Him lead us in His ways, not ours. Surrender. Letting Him give us what we need, and not try to tell Him what it is. We tell Him our desires, wants, feelings, situations, and we trust Him to answer with what is in our best interests and at the beast possible moment to fulfil His will. Peter tells us how our relationship with God and our knowledge of Him guides us into a path of contentment. Notice how this reflects the fruits if the Spirit. ¹“Simon Peter, a bond-servant and apostle of Jesus Christ, to those who have received a faith of the same kind as ours, by the righteousness of our God and Savior, Jesus Christ: ²Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus Christ our Lord; ³seeing that His divine power had granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence. ⁴For by these He has granted to us His precious and magnificent promises, so that by them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world by lust. ⁵Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, ⁶self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, ⁷and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love. ⁸For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they render you neither useless nor unfruitful in the true knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ. ⁹For he who lacks these qualities is blind or short-sighted, having forgotten his purification from his former sins” (2Peter 1:1-9). The knowledge of God has given us EVERYTHING we need to live a Christ centered life. It is our responsibility to put these things to use, and to not let what we see diminish our faith in the promises of God, and the life yet to come in eternity.

We grow in the knowledge of God through His word and through our prayer life with Him. This is all made possible through the death and resurrections of Jesus. “¹⁵Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God. ¹⁶We have come to know and have believed the love which God has for us. God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. ¹⁷By this, love is perfected with us, so that we may have confidence in the day of judgement; because He is, so also are we in this world. ¹⁸There is no fear in love; but perfect loves casts our fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love. ¹⁹We love, because He first loved us” (1 John 4:15-19). Our faith is in our future with Christ. We must keep our focus on that. When trial and tribulations come, we need to understand that God will use these things to grow and strength us. Peter teaches this in his letters. ³“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, ⁴to obtain an inheritance which is imperishable and undefiled and will not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, ⁵who are protected by the power of God through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. ⁶In this you greatly rejoice, even through now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials, ⁷so that the proof of your faith, being more precious than gold which is perishable, even though tested by fire, may be found to result in praise and glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ; ⁸and though you have not seen Him, you love Him, and though you do not see Him now, but believe in Him, you greatly rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, ⁹obtaining as the outcome of your faith the salvation of your souls” (1 Peter 1:3-9).

The duality of the Christian life. A reborn sprit in a body of flesh matches the duality of contentment. We must maintain our relationship with God through a grateful, loving heart and humble obedience. More often than not God will call us out into uncomfortable spaces, to leave us solely dependent on Him. Go with the flow. He will not lead you astray. So many times God’s answer to me is, well put your money where your mouth is. You want to share the gospel with people, well you’ll get your chance. It won’t look like what you’re expecting, so you’ll have to take the opportunities on faith and trust in Me. Contentment. Walking in faith, in accordance to His word, with a trusting and grateful heart. Let God have control of your life. Take on the role like Paul and Peter, to be bond-servants of Christ.

Heavenly Father we need you every day. Guide our hearts and convict us of our sin. Identify our selfish ways. Expose our shellfish desires. Let them be drowned in the blood of Jesus. Our faith is in You, the one true King, redeemer and savior. Thank you Lord for your Holy Spirit, Your advocate and teacher. Thank you for Jesus our Lord and intercessor. Thank you for your presence and the rock of your promise. Thank you for the life you’ve given us, and the hope in Your kingdom to come. Grow our faith in You through whatever trials and tribulations you see coming out way. All things are known to You, past, present, and future. Lead us in your ways, and let Your will be done through us! Halleluiah!!

“Search me, oh God, and know my heart; Try me, and know my anxieties; And see if there is any wicked way in me, And lead me in the way everlasting” (Psalms 13 9:23).

I’ve talked about how our pride is covering our insecurities. The parts of us that we do not want exposed. What is the motivation for us to keep these things hidden? What are we afraid of? We’re afraid of the judgment that will come if people find out we’re not really the person we’re pretending to be. Do I fear my insecurities more than I fear Yahweh, the creator of all things? Am I more afraid of my insecurities being exposed and me ridiculed and rejected for them? This is what pride hides. Our vulnerabilities. It’s where Satan hits us the hardest. So what do I fear the most? I know the answer I should give. I know what the bible tells me.

28 “Do not fear those who kill the body but are unable to kill the soul; but rather fear Him who is able to destroy both soul and body in hell” (Matthew 10:28).

10″The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding” (Proverbs 9:10).

The verse from Matthew 10:28 is what people typically think of when they think about the fear of God. We fear God for the same reasons we fear man. We do not want to come into judgement. Bring up the topic of morality in a public forum and one of the first comments people are going to give is “Who are you to judge me? I may not be perfect but I am a good person.” There is a misconception about Christians. We are not here to judge sinners. Jesus will judge the living and the dead at the final judgement. Jesus tells us this in John’s Gospel. 27″and He (the Father) gave Him (Jesus) authority to execute judgement because He is the Son Of Man” (John 5:27). 30″‘I can do nothing on My own initiative. As I hear, I judge, and My judgement is just, because I do not seek My own will, but the will of Him who sent Me'” (John 5:30). We can also see clearly the will of the Father in John 5:24. “‘Truly, truly, I say to you, he who hears My word, and believes Him who sent Me, has eternal life, and does not come into judgement, but has passed out of death into life.'” The role of a Christian is to speak the truth of God’s word with grace and humility to warn people of their judgement. The same way a fire alarm warns you of a fire. When you hear that alarm go off, the fear of burning alive in the house drives you to run to safety. As such, hearing the truth of sin in our lives should drive nonbelievers to repent of that sin to avoid God’s judgement. As a Christian I believe we’ve contributed to our own problems with evangelism. We often abridge the message of the Gospel to make it more appealing to people who are not saved. In my opinion, John 3:16 is one such verse. The term love in our culture has become very convoluted. So when people hear 16″For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life” (John 3:16). They think aw that’s nice, God loves me, so He has to be happy with that I am doing. This is not the case. The succeeding verses tell a more desperate situation. 17″For God did not send the Son into the world to judge the world, but that the world might be saved through Him. 18He who believes in Him is not judged; he who does not believe has been judged already, because he has not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God. 19This is the judgement, that the Light has come into the world, and men loved the darkness rather than the Light, for their deeds were evil. 20For everyone who does evil hates the Light, and does not come to the Light, so that his deed my be manifested as having been wrought in God” (John 3:17-21).

A lot of people will say here, hold up, wait a minute. I’m not an evil person. I don’t go around harming people and causing trouble. I’ve never been arrested or hurt anyone. This is the pride that hides our insecurity caused by sin. We try to rationalize our behavior by comparing ourselves to other people. God has a completely different standard. The first thing people need to realize is when you commit a sin you commit it against God. “Against you, You only, have I sinned… (Psalms 51:4). Sin is a very grave offense to God. The bible tells us just how serious sin is in God’s eyes. “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 6:23). When we commit sin against God we are given the death sentence, for God is perfectly good and perfectly just. Those who fall short of his standard (sin), are sentenced to death because sin cannot survive in the presence of God. Lev 22:9. God’s moral standard is the Ten Commandments. We must compare ourselves to God’s requirement of us to determine if we are good people or evil people. As you’ll soon see, Jesus was correct when He stated “…No one is good but One, that is, God” (Luke 18:19). Keep in mind that the Ten Commandments are not a top 10 list. It is not that if your sin isn’t specifically listed in the Ten Commandments, its not a serious sin. All sin is serious in God’s eye. The Ten Commandments are a list of the easiest things we should be able to do to maintain a right relationship with God. If we break any of the law (Ten Commandments) we break all of the law. 10 “For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles in one point, he has become guilty of all” (James 2:10). Here is a simple one. The eighth commandment. You shall not steal. Think back in your life. Have you ever stolen something? As a child? As an adult? Candy from a friend’s house? Office supplies from work? Eaten something out of the fridge that wasn’t yours? Any situation you can think of where you have taken something that did not belong to you breaks the eighth commandment, and what do we call someone who steals? A thief. We try to trivialize what we’ve done in the past, because we do not want to admit our guilt. Often times we look at people who commit armed robbery and say “I’m not like them! I didn’t rob a bank or steal a car!” It wasn’t a big deal, no one even noticed! Again pride in ourselves hiding the insecurity and fear of judgement from others about admitting what we are. Thieves. Another easy one. You shall not covet, the tenth commandment. Have you ever yearned for something that someone else had? Perhaps someone else’s job? Someone else’s boyfriend or girlfriend? Do you look at someone rich and famous and covet their money and social status? If you’ve stolen, and I’m am very confident everyone reading this has, then it is the coveting of something that lead to stealing it. Now, to give us an idea of how evil we really are, and how perfect God really is. Jesus made a statement during His sermon on the mount. 27″You have heard that is was said, “You shall not commit adultery’s”; 28 but I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman (or man) with lust for her (or him) has already committed adultery with her (or him) in his (or her) heart” (Matthew 5:27-28). WOW, what a standard Jesus has laid out for all of mankind. Who can possibly keep the seventh commandment after a statement like that? The honest answer is NO ONE CAN. It is the same way with the sixth commandment. Jesus stated in the same sermon on the mount that if we even think in anger toward a brother or sister that we are guilty of murder, and thus break the sixth commandment. So if we can swallow our pride and be honest with ourselves, we’d admit that we have a pretty big problem on our hands. We can pretend we’re great moral individuals by comparing ourselves to other people. People that have done more grievous things in our eyes than we have. I think that’s why shows like Jerry Springer and Maury were so popular. They allowed people to sit and watch the disfunction of others so we could feel better about ourselves. We hide behind our selfish pride thinking it will hide us from the judgement of God.

Paul wrote a letter to the church in Rome. It lays out this exact situation of people denying the sovereignty of God so they can feel better about their true fallen nature. ¹⁸ “For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men who suppress the truth in unrighteousness, ¹⁹ because  that which is known about God is evident within them; for God made it evident to them.  ²⁰ For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse. ²¹ For even though they knew God, they did not honor Him as God or give thanks, but they became futile in their speculations, and their foolish heart was darkened. ²² Professing to be wise, they became fools, ²³ and exchanged the glory of the incorruptible God for an image in the form of corruptible man and of birds and four-footed animals and crawling creatures” (Romans 1:18-23). This is why we follow people rather than Jesus. Famous people who have the things we covet. Why people do really stupid stuff to get what they want, to feel better about ourselves. I hear it all the time in church. I know there are people out there who have made mistakes….well duh. We’re not perfect. We’re going to screw up, and screw up royally through our lives. Salvation is not about not making mistakes. It is about our standing with God. Looking at the commandments, our default standing with God is guilty as sin. This is why Christians profess Jesus as Lord and Savior. What we can never do what Jesus did for us. He was the sacrifice. God sees the righteous of Christ when he looks at a Christian. No matter how we fall short of God’s standard.

Sin, to fall short of God’s expectations. The penalty is eternal separation from God. This is what hell is. To be completely cut off and isolated from His presence. The most fearsome and horrifying thing possible. Something that Jesus came to save us from. Separation from God. The thing that terrified Jesus to the point of sweating blood while praying for his sacrifice to pass in the garden of Gethsemane. In his perfect obedience, He submitted to the will of God, and went to the cross to die. Jesus suffered the judgement of sin for those who will believe in Him as the Messiah sent by God to die in the place of sinners. The fears and insecurities we have in this world that cause us to stumble, Jesus took on during the passion. He was placed on mock trial by the very people who followed him. He was ridiculed and mentally abused by his peers. He was handed over to the Romans who beat and physically tortured Him. He was flogged, whipped with barbed lashes that tore his flesh from his body. Afterward He was forced to carry his method of execution, the cross, through the crowded streets of Jerusalem to His place of death. There He was crucified and left to hang on display as he suffocated and his beaten and mangled body suffered. Through all of this excruciating pain and humiliation, Jesus called out “My God, My God, why have you forsaken me” (Matthew 27:46)? This is when God turned His back on Jesus as the sin of the world – past, present and future – was laid on Jesus. He died for those who will repent and believe that they needed the Messiah to come into the world to bring the gift of salivation. This is why when died, as he said “..It is finished!…”(John 19:30). What He had come into this world to do was complete, and because of this choice to be perfectly obedient to God, to the point of dying on the cross for those who could never be, He was resurrected on the third day so we would share in His glory with God the Father for eternity!! Hallelujah!

John 3:16 – “For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.” What a wonderfully awesome God. He chose to send His Son to die for us rather than leave us to perish in our sinful state. I can never imagine to understand the contrast between Jesus dwelling in the perfect splendor and awesomeness of God and then coming here to earth to live among us in all of our brokenness. Then to willing suffer…and be separated from that splendor for our sake. The Gospel is not just for the lost. It is critical for us Christians as well. It is a constant reminder that we are sinners, saved by grace, through faith in Christ Jesus. A humbling and relieving reminder that our hope for the future is not in this world, but in Jesus Christ who is seated at the mighty right hand of God, and will return again to eliminate evil and usher in an eternity in his presence with those who believe.

Heavenly Father I pray that the good news of the death and resurrection of Your Son Jesus will break the harden hearts of this world. May the fear of the Lord lead to the repentance of people’s sin, and the faith in our Messiah Jesus as atonement for our sinful state. I pray that believers will be lifted up and encouraged by your promise to come back for us, and vanquish evil for all eternity! Amen!

We know God wants us to spend eternity with Him. So what is keeping us from answering the conviction of the Holy Spirit? What keeps a Christian from living out their freedom in Christ Jesus? It is the same thing that keeps the sinner from giving their life to Christ.

PRIDE

We approach God in humility because of who He is and what He has done for us, but the fight to stay humble is real.

Focus on the Family wrote a great article on pride and humility. These exerts really hit home for me and helped my understanding of what God was having me deal with within myself. “This might become clearer if we were to translate the word “pride” as “arrogance” or “haughtiness… On the other side of the coin, it’s important to understand that biblical humility isn’t about self-hatred or self-debasement. It would be more accurate to describe it as a kind of self-forgetfulness. It’s a matter of knowing your place and embracing your role in the bigger scheme of things. It’s about fulfilling God’s purpose for your life with enthusiasm and zeal no matter how you feel. It’s a question of putting other people’s interests ahead of your own” (Focus On The Family “Pride, Humility, and Self-Esteem” 2019) .

One of the first things I think about when I consider the word pride is the expression pride comes before the fall. This expression originates from scriptures in Proverbs, specifically 18 “Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before stumbling” (Proverbs 16:18 NASB1995). Pride is usually associated with Lucifer and his fall from heaven. Ezekiel 28:11-19 speaks specifically about Lucifer. The beauty and wisdom that God crafted into him. The Holy Spirit reveals the splendor that was Lucifer’s design to Ezekiel. Lucifer’s pride was born of that splendor. 16 “By the abundance of your trade you were internally filled with violence, and you sinned; therefore I have cast you as profane from the mountain of God. And I have destroyed you, O covering cherub, from the midst of the stones of fire” (Ezekiel 28:16 NASB1995). The fall of Lucifer is a warning, pride is a condition of the heart and it can be cultivated while serving God. Look how God tells Ezekiel Lucifer was internally filled with violence, which lead him to sin while performing his trade. In Isaiah God specifically states that Lucifer desired God’s throne and was thus cast down. 13 “But you said in your heart, ‘I will ascend to heaven; I will raise my throne above the stars of God, and I will sit on the mount of assembly in the recesses of the north” (Isaiah 14:13 NASB1995). Again God makes this perfectly clear, that pride comes from the heart of our being. Lucifer’s pride grew and was cultivated while he was serving God in the way God intended. At some point Lucifer’s perspective turned from his God centered purpose to a focus on himself. At some point Lucifer began to believe he deserved what God alone can posses, that he could essentially become God by taking His place.

I’ve said it before, and this is a prime example. As I write these pages God is teaching me through them. At this point I got stuck. I was trying to understand where Lucifer’s pride came from, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Now I could have sat here for days, stuck in my own pride trying to figure it out. I mean I’m a smart guy right? I had a feeling God wasn’t going to reveal this part to me. He was was going to use it as a means of teaching me. God is working on my brother at the same time as He is me. We’re both learning about pride, and where we’ve allowed that stronghold to setup in our lives. So rather than sit here stuck in my pride and rely on my own understanding, I need to seek His. Scripture even tells us not to in the book of Proverbs. 5 “Trust in the Lord your God with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding. 6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight” (Proverbs 3:5-6 NASB1995). A lot of wisdom in Proverbs, one of my favorite books in the Bible. All wisdom comes from God. So in humility to God, I sought out His church to see what God was teaching them about pride. More specifically, I went to talk to my bother the next day while we were at work. I brought up exactly what I was writing about in the paragraph above. Sure enough, he had recently watched a sermon series by Robert Morris. He is the pastor of Gateway Church in TX. The sermon series is called The Kings of Babylon. I recommend checking it out on YouTube. Through his sermons Pastor Morris explains how our insecurities can cultivate pride within our hearts. It made a lot sense to me, and it was the missing piece in understanding what happened to Lucifer and what can happen to us if we’re not allowing ourselves to be humbled before God.

God is perfection manifest. He is all powerful, all knowing, and ever lasting creator of all things. No one can ever be equal to God. We have a choice just a Lucifer did. We can let God humble us and allow Jesus to be the Lord of our lives, or we can choose to let our pride twist our hearts and lead us to chase the lie of self righteousness. Jesus warned the religious leaders time and time again about their pride. 43 “Therefor I say to you, the kingdom of God will be taken away from you and given to a people, producing the fruit of it. 44 And he who falls on this stone will be broken to pieces, but on whomever it falls, it will scatter him like dust. 45 When the chief priests and the Pharisees heard His parables, they understood that He was speaking about them” (Matthew 21:43-45 1995). Sin is our big picture problem. It occurs when we allow things like pride to take root in our hearts. When you admit you are a sinner and repent, you fall on the rock of Jesus and the truth breaks your pride. Once broken, sanctification is the process where God begins to put your heart back together. He begins to teach us how to be like Jesus. God can’t teach a prideful heart, because we won’t believe we need Him. The cracks in your heart, the insecurities in us, are either filled with the same grace and love God showed us, or with our desire to play god, like how it consumed Lucifer. The Pharisees were so consumed by their pride, that it lead them to kill the very God they claimed to worship in order to keep their worldly status. It can happen to us also if we don’t stay centered in the word of God.

I said that the idea of insecurities was the key that kept me from knowing why Lucifer rebelled against God. Go back and read how God described Lucifer. It sounds like he is a very awesome creation of God. In all the splendor and perfection that God put into him, when Lucifer compared himself to God, he fell short. No matter who stands before God, we will always fall short of who He is. Always. We have a choice. Do we praise God for who He is, for allowing us into His holy, holy, holy presence? Or do we resent His perfection and desire it for ourselves? This was the temptation in Eden. 5″For God knows that in the day you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil” (Genesis 3:5 NASB1995). Through this act of disobedience, sin entered the hearts of mankind, and our default nature changed to evil.

Pride does keep people from putting their faith in Jesus as their Lord and Savior. A prideful heart must be humbled before a person will repent and be saved, but the constant warnings of pride in the word of God are for His church as well. Just as it was with Lucifer, those of us serving in the church must be aware of the temptation to let pride rule our lives. Pride is the false reality of how we see ourselves. We see ourselves as haughty or in a better light then we really are. It blinds us to our insecurities, and causes us to project them on other people. It gives rise to vanity, how we want others to see ourselves. We begin to present a false presentation of ourselves to others to cement the lie of pride. Jesus is constantly warning His disciples about the hypocrisy of the Pharisees. In Matthew 16 and Luke 12 Jesus compares it to leaven or yeast. The religious leaders were preaching the law to oppress and exploit the Jewish people. They were teaching a message of works and linage. They believe that because they were descendants of Abraham they would be saved. They believed their status as Jews would be their saving grace. The pride of their positions, just like Lucifer, had hardened their hearts to teach lies to their people. They has used their teaching to become the wealthiest and most influential echelon of society. Jesus knew this. He sees into the hearts of all mankind. The Pharisees thought themselves righteous, and through their self righteousness, did as they pleased, not as Jesus taught. The Sermon on the Mount is probably the most famous instruction given by Jesus. It’s found in Matthew chapters 5, 6 and 7. Through His teachings Jesus raises the bar on the expectations given to to the Jews through the law. Jesus explains in beginning of the sermon (Matthew 5:17-20) that He did not come to remove the law but to fulfill it, and the law will stand until the end of days, when heaven and earth are remade. He concludes that section of teaching with this. 20 “‘For I tell you that unless your righteousness surpasses that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven'” (Matthew 5:20 NASB1995). Our righteousness cannot be based on our accomplishments, our traditions, or our status. These are worldly standards that will leave us bankrupt before the judgement of Jesus. He sees our hearts. He knows if pride and vanity are driving our actions. If you preach Christ crucified because its a great way to fill your bank account, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. This is what Jesus said 21 “‘Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord’, will enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father who is in heaven will enter. 22 Many will say to Me on that day, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in Your name, and in Your name case out demons, and in Your name perform many miracles?’ 23 And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; DEPART FROM ME, YOU WHO PRACTICE LAWLESSNESS'” (Matthew 7: 21-23 NASB1995). Heavy words. I’ve heard this passage of scripture used to denounce charismatics in the church. It’s been used to try to claim God does not perform miracles through the gifts of the Holy Spirit. I don’t believe that is what this scripture is staying at all. I believe it means exactly what it states. Like the Pharisees, you can claim righteousness. You can claim Jesus is your Lord, you can even cast out demons and perform miracles in the name of Jesus, because there is POWER in the name of Jesus. But your heart will reflect whether or not you have a relationship with Jesus. If you haven’t given your life to God by faith in the death and resurrection of Jesus for the forgiveness of sin, all the miracles in the world cannot justify you before the judgement seat of Jesus.

Miracles happen. The gifts of the Spirit are real. I’ve seen people healed and God has shown me visions of things before they happened. A grandmother of a friend was sick in the hospital. The doctors had done everything they could do. They couldn’t figure our how to make her better, and had told the family its just a matter of time before she died A group of believers were asked to come pray over her, so we did. Shortly after we left the hospital, she had vomited up some kind of hard infectious ball, and recovered. God does heal, and he uses his children as servants for these things, but it is when and how He sees fit according to His plans, not ours. Everything is done for His glory. When I was young in the faith, having seen these things, I wanted to pray for everyone. Pray for their healing. The thought was good, but here I am years later, realizing I wanted it for my glory. I thought how cool it was, and how amazing it was. It was amazing, but my heart wasn’t in it for the glory of God. I was in it because I thought it made me a good Christian. Spend time in the word. Examine your heart through the scriptures. Let God sanctify you. It’s a tough process. It will expose your insecurities. To be humbled is to acknowledge our short falls and surrender ourselves to God’s plan for our lives. That includes using our insecurities to demonstrate His glory. That is what He can do through our obedience to Him despite our flaws. Whatever service we provide for God and His kingdom, we can’t loose sight of our service to Him. Jesus speaks of this over and over. ¹⁷ The seventy returned with joy, saying, “Lord, even the demons are subject to us in Your name.” ¹⁸ And He said to them, “I was watching Satan fall from heaven like lightning. ¹⁹ Behold, I have given you authority to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy, and nothing will injure you. ²⁰ Nevertheless do not rejoice in this, that the spirits are subject to you, but rejoice that your names are recorded in heaven” ( Luke 10:17,19-20 NASB1995).

The concept of humility defined in the beginning of this article is supported with this scripture from the gospel of Luke. It is also the scripture that started my journey of allowing God to expose and remove the prideful areas in my heart. ⁷ “Which of you, having a slave plowing or tending sheep, will say to him when he has come in from the field, ‘Come immediately and sit down to eat’? ⁸ But will he not say to him, ‘Prepare something for me to eat, and properly clothe yourself and serve me while I eat and drink; and afterward you may eat and drink’? ⁹ He does not thank the slave because he did the things which were commanded, does he? ¹⁰ So you too, when you do all the things which are commanded you, say, ‘We are unworthy slaves; we have done only that which we ought to have done’” (Luke 17:7-10 NASB1995). When we are being obedient and grinding out what ever God has us doing, do we remain grateful for the cross, or are we like the servant He’s warning us about? A bragging and boastful servant before God always saying how great of a servant he is and boasting for a reward? I like the use of the word slave in this translation, because we’re all the slaves to something. It could be greed, lust, power, knowledge, addiction, fame, etc. These are the things of the world we use to fill our insecurities. The more we strive for these things, the more they take from us.

So what’s this look like in my life? I mentioned earlier that when I was stuck, God directed me to my brother. Christians need to surround themselves with fellow believers who we can be honest with. People we can walk with and learn from each other what God has been teaching us. A few days later my brother was telling me about how God was revealing pride is certain areas and behaviors in his life. My brother had been under serious conviction about this and he was sharing all of that with me. He was telling me how I should see the areas of pride in my life. I agreed with what my brother was saying, as far as I had some of the same issues in my life. I could tell I had prideful areas in my life, the same way he did. Rightly so since we’re brothers and we come from the a lot of the same life experiences growing up. As he was sincerely trying to tell me of the harm those areas cause, I knew it, but it didn’t really affect me. It was like I was apathetic to my situation, and I really didn’t care. I knew I should care, but I really didn’t. Well while he was telling all of this, our coworker sitting next to us, we were on lunch break, gets up abruptly and dives into this rant about his experience at a cellular store and their poor customer service. He got very angry. He told us how he just tore into the customer service people there because they couldn’t fix his problem, and he’d wasted an entire day’s worth of his time. It was a huge inconvenience to his life. Scott and I looked at each other in almost bewilderment. Here is God showing us exactly what we’re talking about by convicting our coworker through our conversation. I’m even more befuddled at this point, because I’m thinking I’m the one that should be under conviction right now. As we were pointing out that his pride is what caused him to treat the customer service people so poorly, he tried to quote scripture in his defense. He used 1″Do not judge so that you will not be judged. 2For in the way you judge, you will be judged” (Matthew 7:1-3 NASB1995). A common scripture people try to use to defend their behaviors. My brother told him to finish the scripture. He just looked at us silent and angry. So we asked him again, to finish the entire scripture, to use it in context. At that point with a furled brow, he stormed out of the break room. The entire scripture he was taking out of context is 1″Do not judge so that you will not be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. 3Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye. but do not notice the log that is in your own eye” (Matthew 7:1-3 NASB1995)? A very prideful reaction. A humble heart would have stopped and asked what the rest of the scripture was. I thought a lot about that situation the rest of the day at work. When I got home, I was beginning to feel convicted, so I spent time in prayer asking God to show me the log in my eye. So I start reading the beatitudes, ending in the scripture our coworker was quoting out of context. I read the entire sermon on the mount which ends with the scripture I quoted earlier. “Not everyone who says to me ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven…I never knew you, depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness.’ 24 Therefore everyone who hears these words of Mine and ACTS on them, may be compared to a wise man who build his house on the rock” (Matthew 7:21-24 NASB1995). At this point I’m under some heavy conviction, to the point were I just need to take a break. I decide to que up a Ted talk, because surely God can’t get to me through that…The ladies name was Susan David, and the talk was on emotional flexibility. She talked about how over positivity is ruining people’s ability to function in reality, and how it breeds denial in our lives. When she said the word denial, it was like a hot poker just got pushed through my eyeball. That word just about brought me to tears. I was in denial about my pride, and that was the moment it became very real to me.

The Holy Spirit wasn’t done there. I was aware of my pride, but I wasn’t free yet. That would come the next day. My bro sent me a text that night saying we should pray for our coworker about his pride since God was using us to expose his while working on ours as well. So I did, and the next day our coworker came into my office as he normally does first thing in the morning. He brought up the conversation we had the day before at lunch trying to justify his use of the scriptures. He kept referring to the sad state of human nature as the reason he gets so mad. Having to deal with people in such a state always made his blood boil, a state I can relate to from how I was before I was saved. I would correct him each time he mentioned the state of human nature. I would point out to him that is actually called sin, and its at the core of our short comings. He’d just shrug that off and continue trying to explain himself. He referenced Jesus in the temple when He was flipping over tax collector’s tables and running them out with a whip. He told me even Jesus got mad, so what was the problem with his own anger? The actual scripture is Matthew 21:12-17. I told him Jesus was mad because His people were desecrating God by turning His temple into a place of cheating and thievery. Jesus did not get mad to make His own ego bigger. After he ran out the thieves, He healed the sick and lame, and the people sang praises to God. Jesus said 54″…If I glorify Myself, My glory is nothing; it is My Father who glorifies Me, of whom you say, ‘He is God'”(John 8:54 NASB1995). What Jesus did was out of obedience to God the Father. He was not on earth for self achievement. He came because God the Father sent Him to die for the sin that drives us away from God. Jesus came to die in our place. And because of His obedience, God resurrected Jesus from the dead, granting all of us who believe it to be truth, forgiveness of our sin and an everlasting joy in eternity with Him. My pride drives me to put myself before God, and just like Lucifer, it will drive me to desire to be above God, beholding to no one else but myself. This isn’t a Kung Fu movie. The student doesn’t become greater than the master. 24″ A disciple is not above his teacher, nor a slave above his master. It is enough for the disciple that he become like his teacher, and the slave like his master” (Matthew 10:24 NASB1995). When we begin to put our ways above the teachings of Jesus. When we believe the scriptures are not speaking to us. Pride is infecting our hearts, and we to need bring ourselves back to the saving grace of Jesus at the cross. It will be a continuing struggle. A man that discipled me very early on in my walk told me that time and time again we will need a personal revival in our hearts constantly. I finally understood what he was trying to teach me. To repent of our pride and to allow the humility of Christ to flow out of our hearts. As we go about our lives, doing what God asks us to do, if we do not stay focused on the Gospel message, pride will consume us also. Even with the unsaved, as people build experience and “move up” in the world, if they loose sight of where they came from, pride will consume them too. As Jesus would say, whoa to the rich, because they have always lived in a world where they are in want of nothing, and to them it is especially tough to understand people who aren’t. Like the Pharisees, who were born into riches, given the best educations, and taught they were the ones closest to God. They did not have a perspective of humility, they used the life saving word of God to control and manipulate the masses.

Pride calluses our heart to hide our insecurities, our short falls. So we’re to serve God in humility, which exposes those insecure parts of us…but what am I supposed to do with all of those insecurities? Paul said 6Even if I should choose to boast, I would not be a fool, because I would be speaking the truth. But I refrain, so no one will think more of me than I warranted by what I do or say, or because of these surpassingly great revelations. Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. 8Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9But He said to me. ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness,’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weakness, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2Corinthians 12:6-10 NIV). Paul admits he could have banged his chest and said look how awesome I am because God gave me all of this knowledge and revelations, but rather Paul chose to resist his pride and give the glory where it is due, to God who taught, directed, and empowered him through the Holy Spirit. As you peel back your pride it exposes your flaws. It becomes even tougher still as Paul mentions hardships, insults and persecutions being added to on top of his personal internalized struggles. Many people preach Paul’s thorn, trying to figure out what his sins were. I believe this is so we can try to justify whatever sin we enjoy…if Paul had one…two…or even three…then so can we. We preach Paul because Jesus is perfect obedience made flesh and it hits against our pride. We know behind our pride is our weakness, and who wants to be exposed? Even Adam and Eve hid in the garden when their sin was exposed. The fruit of knowledge exposed their insecurities…they didn’t even know were there. Just like Lucifer, the perfection and splendor of God will expose our short comings. And like Paul we have a choice. To humble ourselves and submit all this to His glory, or let the conviction of the Holy Spirit bloat us out in pride. Remember scripture tells us 18″Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before stumbling” (Proverbs 16:18 NASB1995). Another warning from Jesus. 1″At that time the disciples came to Jesus and said, ‘Who then is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?’ 2And He called a child to Himself and set him before them, 3and said ‘Truly I say to you, unless you are converted and become like children, you will not enter the kingdom of heaven. 4’Whoever then humbles himself like a child, he is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. 5And whoever received one such child in My name received Me; 6but whoever causes one of these little ones who believes in Me to stumble, it would be better for him to have a heavy millstone hung around his neck, and to be drowned in the depth of the sea” (Matthew 18:1-6 NASB1995). This is where religion can really disrupt spiritual development. If people only see us acting out our false perfections, and not being honest with our struggles, it can lead to the stumbling blocks Jesus is talking about. When we pretend to have it all under control, it causes others to think they aren’t worthy of the love of Christ. Where that couldn’t be further from the truth. Jesus died for everyone. 30″The Pharisees and their scribes began grumbling and said to them, ‘Why do you eat and drink with tax collectors and sinners?’ 31And Jesus answered and said to them. ‘It is not those who are well who need a physician, but those who are sick. I have not come to call the righteous but sinners to repentance'” (Luke 5: 31-32 NASB1995).

My social anxiety, the feeling that I am not important walking into a new social environment. I used to hide that with alcohol. I became quite the social butterfly when I would drink, because it hid my issues. It covered my self centered reaction. Now, living for Christ, I find my fulfillment in Him. Jesus loves me, my importance is in Him…that leaves my spirit fulfilled. So when the insecurity is attached by the enemy, I can find my fulfillment in my relationship with Jesus. This allows me to enter into relationships and interactions with other people without needing them to fill my expectations of receiving attention and boosting my ego. It’s still tough though. I tend to be antisocial, so I am thankful for the grace and mercy of Jesus for the times when I still act to cover those insecurities for my own purposes, and the times when I try to fill it with worldly things like sex, attention, success, entertainment, etc. These things are distractions, and do not provide a permanent solution to the void we try to fill them with. It’s like a motivational speaker can get you pumped up, even expose your insecurities, but only Jesus can fill the hole that is uncovered. Everything else is fleeting, and only leaves us wanting more and more to find out it fills less and less of the missing pieces.

Revelations begins with Jesus giving John warnings for the seven churches. Jesus points out the good things these churches were doing, but also lets them know that Jesus also sees the sinful things as well. We can hide our transgressions from one another, but we cannot hide them from God. We have to let the simplicity of the Gospel keep us humble. Its not because of our actions that people are saved, but by the presence of the Holy Spirit moving through us. There is no other name than Jesus that someone can be saved from sin. Jesus came to earth, the begotten son of a virgin, lived a perfectly obedient life to Yahweh (He fulfilled the 10 commandments), was crucified for revealing Himself as God made flesh (the Messiah), died on the cross in our place(for the wages of sin is death) and was buried. On the third day He was resurrected by the power of the Holy Spirit, He ascended into heaven where He is alive today, and He is seated at the right hand of God, interceding to God on our behalf. Those who repent of their sin and call on the name of Jesus will be saved, and the righteousness of Jesus will cover their sin through the judgement to come.

I write these chapters in hopes it would open your heart to the Holy Spirit and allow conviction into the areas of your life where pride has taken hold. Just as God did for me through this entire process. Once I was humbled God showed me how simple is was to over come my struggles. I just had to get out of the way, because it was something He showed me before I even started. I was just too prideful to understand. Pride kept me from writing this book. Pride that was covering up my fears. My fears of what God may ask me to do once this book is done. To share it with those who need to hear this message…me, this antisocial, introverted guy, who’d rather keep to himself. But one thing that does lite my heart on fire, is the Gospel of Christ. My need to lay myself down before the cross and to surrender my weaknesses to the glory of God the Father!

Revelations 12:10-11 “Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say: “Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God, and the authority of his Messiah. For the accuser of our brothers and sisters, who accuses them before our God day and night, has been hurled down. 11 They triumphed over him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony; they did not love their lives so much as to shrink from death.”

The concept of an omnipresent, omniscient, and all powerful God can be intimidating, and hard to come to terms with. It means He already knows everything about us. We can’t hide anything from Him. All of our actions, even the ones we hide from the public, He’s already seen. There are no secrets from God. He knows it all. If He knows all this stuff how can God still want me? Or even why do I need him? I mean, how do I approach God in light of all He already knows about me? We approach Him with humility, with thanksgiving, and with repentance. God wants a relationship with us. It is why we were made. A relationship with God is the meaning of life. Look at what God told Ezekiel to tell the house of Israel. “Say to them, ‘As I live!’ declares the Lord God, ‘I take no pleasure in the death of the wicked, but rather that the wicked turn from his way and live. Turn back, turn back from your evil way! Why then will you die O house of Israel'” (Ezekiel 33:11)? Even with God knowing everything everyone has done and will ever do, He still sent His son Jesus to earth for us. That’s right.

Jesus went to the cross willingly. He did not go because of you, He went to the cross for you!

God is holy, He requires perfect obedience. That is something we can never do. Adam and Eve, the first man and woman, lived in a perfect world. God gave everyone free will. It was Adam and Eve’s choice to disobey God and to give into the contemplation of Satan. This is when sin entered the world. The price for sin, for disobeying God is death. All life comes from God, and the disobedience of Adam and Eve cut us off from Him, and brought sin into the world. It is why we age and die. We are born with the sickness of sin, and there is nothing we can do to make up for it.

So why didn’t God just end it all there? Why allow people to exist in this broken state? Well, because God had a plan from the very beginning. When Adam and Eve fell in the garden, look at God’s reaction. He told Satan the Messiah would be born and will destroy the death sentence Satan brought into the world. This is what God is talking about in this scripture. “And I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your seed and her seed; he shall bruise you on the head, and you shall bruise him on the heel” (Genesis 3:15). When God says something it is going to happen, it’s a done deal. It’s guaranteed. A promise that will be fulfilled. This is why our hope should always be in the Christ Jesus. Later when Jesus showed up on the scene, He would bring atonement for the sin, and allow us to join God in heaven for eternity. God removing Adam and Eve from the garden of Eden was for our own good. Lets look at the scriptures. “²¹The Lord God made garments of skin for Adam and his wife, and clothed them. ²²Then the Lord Good said, ‘Behold, the man has become like one of Us, knowing good and evil; and now, he might stretch out his hand, and take also from the tree of life, and eat, and live forever’ – ²³therefore the Lord God sent him out from the garden of Eden, to cultivate the ground from which he was taken” (Genesis 3: 21-23). God prepared Adam and Eve for life outside of Eden. He clothed them. He also sent them out so that they could not eat of the fruit of eternal life and be stuck in their sinful state forever.

God loves His people, and has taken care of them from the very beginning and will for eternity. Our entire lives in this broken world are to help turn us to the grace and glory of God. In this broken world we at least are still in the presence of God. I couldn’t image how horrible eternity would be once we’re deprived of it. That’s what hell is, an existence without the presence of God. It’s described in the bible as a place of unquenchable thirst, of consuming fires, and of complete darkness. Doesn’t sound too good to me. This is why God hasn’t just wiped the slate clean and ended it all already. His patience is amazing. God hates sin, but wants as many people in heaven with Him as possible. If Jesus came back right now, think of all the people who wouldn’t be saved…the future generations. A great scripture example of this is Jonah. God sent Jonah to tell the people of Nineveh to repent. Nineveh was very far from the ways of God. It would be like God asking you to go into Nazi Germany at the height of Hitler’s atrocities and tell them to repent. Most of us wouldn’t want to do it, just like Jonah, because we hated them for what they were doing. God can see through those things and into the heart of the matter. God knows who will repent and be saved, and He also knows who will not. It is our duty to be obedient to God in whatever He asks us to do. Jonah finally goes to Nineveh like God told him, even though it took almost drowning and being swallowed by a fish to get him to obey. Jonah still didn’t like the fact that God saved the people of Nineveh, to the point he asked God to strike him dead over an entire nation of sinners being saved. ¹“But it greatly displeased Jonah and he became angry. ²He prayed to the Lord and said, ‘Please Lord, was not this what I said while I was still in my own country? Therefore in order to forestall this I fled to Tarshish, for I knew that You are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abundant in loving-kindness, and one who relents concerning calamity. ³Therefore now, O Lord, please take my life from me, for death is better to me than life.’ ⁴The Lord said, ‘Do you have good reason to be angry'” (Jonah 4:1-4)? Have you hated someone so much that whenever something good happens to them, it made you hate them even more? I was like that about my ex-wife for many years, until God taught me how to forgive. Jonah then sits on the hill and watches to see what is to become of the city. God makes a plant grow up to offer shade for Jonah. God then orders a worm to kill it and send a scorching heat and wind to make Jonah very uncomfortable. Again Jonah asked to die from his discomfort. He seems to be pretty dramatic, but it was obviously a very bad situation. Jonah gets upset about the plant dying and God’s response is pretty awesome. ⁹“Then God said to Jonah, ‘Do you have good reason to be angry about this plant?’ And he said(Jonah), ‘I have good reason to be angry, even to death,’ ¹⁰Then the Lord said, ‘You had compassion on the plant for which you did not work and which you did not cause to grow, which came up overnight and perished overnight. ¹¹Should I not have compassion on Nineveh, the great city in which there are more than 120,000 person who do not know the difference between their right and left hand, as well as many animals'” (Jonah 9-11 NASB1995)? I love these passages as it not only shows God’s great compassion for people, His ability to see into the hearts of everyone, and its contrast to man’s sinful perspective. Pay attention to God perspective on the sinful people. Look how he describes them. He basically tells Jonah, you want me to kill people that don’t even know they are doing something wrong? That’s why God sent Jonah, so Nineveh would realize their wrong doing and repent, to change their perspective and follow the will of God. What we see on the surface, may not completely reflect what God sees in someone’s soul. Remember we were all sinners before we became saints…saved by the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.

The contrast between my deceptive heart and God’s sovereign will. I find myself like Jonah at times, and if I’m not careful will treat people with cold apathy, rather than the love, compassion, and patience that Jesus showed me throughout my life, even before I was saved. See I thought I was good to go before I was saved. Just like Nineveh, I didn’t realize my sin until the Holy Spirit revealed it to me. “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8). While we were yet sinners….God brought me to the Gospel of John. The adulterous woman brought before Jesus in the temple.

³“The scribes and the Pharisees brought a woman caught in adultery, and having set her in the center of the court, ⁴they said the Him, ‘Teacher, this woman has been caught in adultery, in the very act. ⁵Now in the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women, what then do You say'” (John 8:3-6)? Jesus stooped down to write in the sand and yet the scribes and Pharisee demanded he answer their questions. When he did address them this is what he hold them. “…’He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her’…”(John 8:7). Jesus went back to writing on the ground, and when he stood up again the woman’s accusers had all left. ¹⁰“Straightening up, Jesus said to her, ‘Woman, where are they? Did no one condemn you?’ ¹¹She said, ‘No one, Lord.’ And Jesus said, ‘I do not condemn you, either. Go. From now on sin no more'” (John 8:10-11). Go and sin no more….how could anyone live up to that? We all struggle. We all give into temptation. We’re not perfectly obedient to God, that’s why Jesus came to die for our sin…so how did Jesus expect this woman to sin no more? Well here is what Jesus says sin is. Jesus tells us that He will send the Holy Spirit to us. ⁸“‘And He (The Holy Spirit), when He comes, will convict the world concerning sin and righteousness and judgement; ⁹concerning sin, because they do not believe in Me, ¹⁰and concerning righteousness, because I go to the Father and you no longer see Me; ¹¹and concerning judgement, because the ruler of this world has been judged'” (John 16:8-11). That’s why Jesus said go and sin no more, because this woman, through the grace, mercy and forgiveness of Christ Jesus, believed He was the messiah. She gave her life to Christ that moment. This is what Paul is talking about in Romans. ⁹“that if you confess with your mouth and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved; ¹⁰for with the heart a person believes, resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth he confesses, resulting in salvation”(Romans 10:9-10). Through God’s forgiveness we can approach Him with humility and repent of our sin. ¹“Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. ²For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death” (Romans8:1-2). AMEN! So, this woman believes Jesus is the messiah. Would she go to heaven if she died right then? No, Jesus had not yet gone to the cross. This why we need Jesus. God’s forgiveness was there to show the people who Jesus was, but justice still had to be paid. The wages of sin is death, and a sacrifice was needed to pay for the curse God had placed on mankind after the fall. Jesus death on the cross paid that price. Jesus was blameless. He never disobeyed God, even to the point of dying on the cross for the sin of the fall. That is why God raised Him from the dead. His righteousness for His perfect obedience is placed on us when we put our faith in Him as our Lord and Savior. When we believe that Jesus is the son of God who died in our place and was resurrected from the dead. God does not see the evil we did, but he sees the righteousness of Christ, because Jesus took our place on the cross. When we realize we are trapped by sin in our lives it should humble us and bring us to seek out God. There are many people out there that want God’s forgiveness. They want to hear that the evil in their lives will be over looked, but that cannot happen without repentance.

How powerful is repentance? Remember Nineveh? Look what Jesus says about that people of Nineveh after they repented, turned to God. “‘The men of Nineveh will stand up with this generation at the judgement, and will condemn it because they repented at the preaching of Jonah; and behold, something greater than Jonah is here”‘ (Matthew 12:41). The grace and mercy of God should lead our hearts to repent. To renew our mind, or change our perspective. Acknowledging the actions of Christ, willingly going to the cross for our guilt, willingly dying for the sin in our hearts, should make us so thankful to Him that we in turn willing lay down our lives…God take my life and use it for Your glory! What does this mean? When we surrender our lives to Christ and receive the gift of salvation, the Holy Spirit comes to live inside us…sound strange? We’re all spiritual beings. Our spirit joins with God’s spirit. His light shines inside us, and when we submit to God showing us how He wants us to serve Him, His light can shine on other people’s darkness through us. This is what it means to be a Christian. .

That is exactly why I am writing this book. I want to share the good news of what God has done for me with you. His grace and mercy is for everyone who will answer His call. Something I went through shortly after I was saved, but He didn’t reveal it to me until now. Lets go back to the scripture in Revelations in the preface of my blog.

¹⁰ “Then I heard a loud voice in heaven, saying, ‘Now the salvation, and the power, and the kingdom of our God and the authority of His Christ have come, for the accuser of our brethren has been thrown down, he who accuses them before our God day and night.  ¹¹ And they overcame him because of the blood of the lamb and the word of their testimony, and they did not love their life even when faced with death. ¹² For this reason, rejoice, O heavens and you who dwell in them. Woe to the earth and the sea, because the devil has come down to you, having great wrath, knowing that he has only a short time'” (Rev 12:10-12).

I was an adulterer before I was saved. I had an affair with a married woman. I also knew after I was saved that God washed all that way in His eyes. Jesus righteousness covers me, so when God sees me, He sees what Jesus did for me. But it still nagged at me and I could not shake it, no matter how much I told myself that I was covered by the blood of Jesus. My neighbor at the time, a Christian, would disciple me, and share his wisdom with me. One day I just had to tell him, “Amaha, I just have to tell you man. I committed adultery before I was saved, and it’s been bothering the crap out of me.” He told me confessing our sins to each other was biblical. It helps us heal, and keeps us humble. It did make me feel better, but it wasn’t until I wrote this chapter and revisited the account of the adulterous woman did God finally show me exactly why it bothered me so much. Reading about the adulterous woman, I could feel the shame and humiliation she suffered in front of all those people. They brought her in front of the entire court. What’s the worst part of doing something really wrong? Getting caught, and having your secret exposed. Standing in front of everyone and seeing them passing judgement on you. This is exactly what was bothering me. I knew as a Christian my past was exposed before God. I had no secrets, but I still had to come to terms with my shame. Shame traps us when we have the wrong perspective. I looked right past the way God sees me. I let the shame silence me, instead of letting God use the situation to bring Himself Glory!. ² “O, people. how long will you turn my glory into shame? How long will you love vanity and seek after lies” (Psalms 4:2)? I was so worried about how people would see me. Just like those who accused the woman before Jesus, and like Rev 12:10 tells us, Satan is constantly tempting us and accusing us before God. He temps us into doing wrong and then tells God, “Hey! Look what he just did!” Satan accuses us before God to bring shame into our lives, especially from our past. He is trying to keep us quiet. Our testimony will reach people for Christ. What you went through, there are others out there, that are in the same place you were. You can reach those people and say look what God did for me, He is willing to do it for you too!

Look at what Jesus said, ⁷“‘Ask, and it will be given to you, seek, and you will find, knock, and it will be opened to you. ⁸For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks, finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened'”(Matthew 7:7-8). God’s forgiveness is there so we can come to Him and repent. No shame, no humiliation, just a Father with open arms to receive His children. When we repent of sin, when we turn our trust away from what we can accomplish, what this world temps us with, and put our faith in God’s promise through Jesus Christ, it brings us to the cross, where Jesus paid the debt of our sin. When our faith and hope is in the death and resurrection of Jesus, we’re lifted up, just as Jesus was raised from the dead, to new life!

⁴ “But God, being rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loves us, ⁵even when we were dead in our transgressions, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), ⁶and raised us up with Him, and seated us with Him in the heavenly place in Christ Jesus…⁸For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; ⁹not a result of works, so that no one may boast. ¹⁰For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them” (Ephesians 2:4-6,8-10).

Now, our perspective is everything! If our perspective is focused on or around ourselves, we’ll miss what God has for us. What causes new believers to not get baptized? The people I’ve talked to, it’s shame. They don’t feel worthy enough to do it. In all actuality, baptism is a public profession of your faith. Once you’re a Christian, you’re a Christian. You’re worthy once you repent and place your faith in Jesus as Lord, because He is worthy. Here again, shame creeps in and makes us silent. It prevents us from glorifying God. As these new Christians work through their testimony, eventually they are “ready” to be baptized. They have moved from a state of self focused shame to a state of glorifying God through what He has done for them!! Once they realized God’s view of them is the only view that matters, shame will shrink away. God is bigger than your shame. He conquered it. God will turn your shame into His glory. We just have to let Him. Look what He did with Adam and Eve. Adam and Eve hid from God in shame after they disobeyed His command to not eat the fruit. “They heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden” (Genesis 3:8). They hid in shame. Shame binds us to such a narrow field of view. Did they really think they could hide from God? Do we really think we can? No way! We deceive ourselves! We already covered the evidence of God’s forgiveness for Adam and Eve when he clothed them and set them out of the garden. God also told Satan that the shame he brought on Adam and Eve, God would use for His Glory, to bring about the birth of the Messiah who would conquer the power of death and bring salvation to all who call Him the LORD God!!

I pray for anyone who is struggling with shame. Whether you are a Christian or not. I’ve been there, and I’m sure I’ll be there again. Salvation is forever, but we’ll get our leg caught in a hurdle from time to time. The grace of our LORD allows us to get back up again and continue on our path. Jesus Christ knows the feeling and weight of shame. Jesus bore the shame of every single person who ever lived and will ever live on the cross. Shame from every possible source, from lying to adultery, every possible source. He died for your sin, your shame, and your guilt! Nothing in this world can fill the hole that these feelings leave in us. Nothing we can do will ever be enough to over come the weight we feel, but the good news is there is hope. There is a way out. “Jesus Christ said, ‘I am the way, and the truth, and the life, no one comes to the Father but through Me'” (John 14:6 NASB1995). Jesus is waiting, patiently, for you to answer God’s call, and accept Jesus as your Lord and savior. If you feel that tug on your soul, confess. Tell Jesus you’re a sinner in need of a savior. Tell Him you believe He is the son of God sent as the every lasting sacrifice for your sin. Let the mercy and peace of our Lord fill the empty places of your soul. Find rest in our LORD God. I pray you’ll repent and begin to walk your new life of worship with God.

As a Christian it’s important to learn how God get’s your attention.  The way He lets you know He’s trying to tell you something.  This particular time He woke me up in the middle of the night.  I’ve always been a sound sleeper.  It’s not very often I wake up in the middle of the night.  The times I do, it’s usually just to glance at the clock, thank God its 3AM, and I go back to sleep.  I fall asleep about as fast as I wake up normally.  One night that wasn’t the case.  I woke up around midnight wide awake.  There was a thought in my head I couldn’t let go of. “Life is too short, play hard.” It was very odd because not only could I not get this though out of my head, but it really bothered me.  I lay in bed for a couple hours that night turning this expression over and over in my head.  I was trying to figure out why it bothered me so much, to the point of it keeping me awake.  So many thoughts ran through my head, all centered around this expression.

Life is too short…

Life is too short…

Life is too short…live while you can…

Life is too short…I don’t have time for this marriage…

If someone has cancer…Life is too short…

Life is too short to make ourselves happy…

Life is too short…I don’t have time to make up for all that I’ve done…

Eventually I tired myself out thinking about so many different situations like those.  I fell asleep again, but I wrote it down when I woke up the next morning. Life is too short…and it still bothered me.

I eventually realized why that expression bothered me so much. Why I couldn’t go back to sleep that night. The expression life is too short was the lie.  The lie the devil uses to keep us away from God.  Life is not short.  Life is eternal, and we have a choice to make.  Do we choose heaven with God, or do we chose hell with Satan?  Satan made his choice.  He fought God and lost. Now its Satan’s time that is short, and he will do what ever he can to take you with him.  When we believe our time in this world is short, we try to fill it with self indulgence. If there is no hope in our future, what difference does it make how we live our lives?  When time is short we start taking short cuts. When its the time fame on our lives we begin taking moral short cuts. Morality is the standard God has given us to protect and care for us.  It guards our conscience and protects our sanity. We try to fill our hopelessness with our own desires.  All the sex, drugs, power, control, and money in the world can’t fill that void.  Our homes and lives can look so neat and in place on the outside, but inside anxiety and discontentment drive us onward.  Trying to find comfort for our discontentment leaves us vulnerable to the lies of Satan. The more we take, the more we want, and the more weary we become, because we can’t ever have enough.  The grass is greener on the other side because we don’t want enough, we want it all.  Just like Satan did.  Satan wanted it all, including God’s throne. Its temptation that drives us and its pride that blinds us to what we really need.  As it was with the ruler Jesus met in Luke 18.

18 A ruler questioned Him, saying, “Good Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?” 19And Jesus said to him, “Why do you call Me good? No one is good except God alone. 20You know the commandments, ‘DO NOT COMMIT ADULTERY, DO NOT MURDER, DO NOT STEAL, DO NOT BEAR FALSE WITNESS, HONOR YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER,”‘ 21And he said, “All these things I have kept from my youth.” 22When Jesus heard this, He said to him, “One thing you still lack; sell all that you possess and distribute it to the poor, and you shall have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.” 23But when he had heard these things, he became very sad, for he was extremely rich. 24And Jesus looked at him and said, “How hard it is for those who are wealthy to enter the kingdom of God! 25For it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.” 26They who heard it said, “Then who can be saved?” 27But He said, “The things that are impossible with people are possible with God” (Luke 18:18-27 NASB1995).

The pride of this man blinded him to the fact that the answer to his question was standing right in front of him.  Not to mention Jesus asked him if he believed Jesus was the Messiah, God made flesh for the forgiveness of our sin, since the man called Him good.  As is with many of us the pride of our heart blinds us to the truth.  The ruler believed himself perfect, claiming to have held to the 10 commandments.  That pride is what crushed the ruler.  Jesus told him to go sell all his things, the things he valued above all else, the things he’d put so much time and effort into during his life.  What Jesus was showing him was that he was not keeping the 10 commandments. He was missing the 2 more important ones.

35One of them, a lawyer, asked Him a question, testing Him, 36″Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” 37And He said to him, ” ‘YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.’ 38This is the great and foremost commandment. 39The second is like it, “You SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.’ 40On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 22:35-40 NASB1995).

We all have weaknesses. A broken part of us that desires what this world offers us.  Satan uses that weakness to tempt the evil in our hearts.  Jesus attests to the evil within us.

20And He was saying, “That which proceeds out of the man, that is what defiles the man. 21For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed the evil thoughts, fornications, thefts, murders, adulteries, 22deeds of coveting and wickedness, as well as deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride and foolishness. 23All these evil things proceed from within and defile the man” (Mark 7:20-23 NASB1995).  Our heart condition, our sinful nature, is why we need Jesus. He was free of sin, and He died on the cross in our place. We cannot earn our way to heaven. We can’t make up for the sin in our hearts by doing good deeds for people. To the same point, our unworthiness of God won’t keep us out of heaven either. “…for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23 NASB1995). This is exactly the point of Jesus meeting the Samaritan woman at the well.

The entire story is John 4:4-42. I’m not going to copy it all here, but rather stick to the verses God was teaching me with.

19 The woman said to Him, “Sir, I perceive that You are a prophet. 20Our fathers worshiped in this mountain, and you people say that in Jerusalem is the place where men ought to worship.” 21Jesus said to her, “Woman, believe Me, an hour is coming when neither in this mountain nor in Jerusalem will you worship the Father. 22You worship what you do not know; we worship what we know, for salvation is from the Jews. 23But an hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for such people the Father seeks to be His worshipers. 24God is spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth.” 25The woman said to Him, “I know the Messiah is coming (He who is called Christ); when that One comes, He will declare all things to us.” 26Jesus said to her, “I who speak to you am He” (John 4:19-26 NASB).

The Samaritan woman just like the ruler thought she could only be seen in the eyes of God if she did just the right things at just the right places.  Unlike the ruler, she knew she could never accomplish these things. So for her there was no hope of her ever entering the presence of God.  She told Jesus she could not worship God since Samaritans were not welcome in Jerusalem.  She knew just like the Jews that the Messiah was coming, but she felt there was no way for her to receive the Messiah since she wasn’t allowed to worship in the temple. Jesus answered her in a very profound way, one that hit me like a bolt of lightning in my soul.  He told her that salvation comes believing the truth and worshipping in the spirit.

One Truth: There is one God, Yahweh, who created all things.   One Spirit: We’re given one life by God and it is eternal.  One way: There is only one way to reconcile our sinful hearts to God, and that is through the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ.

He told her it’s not something you earn.  The politician tried to earn his salvation, and the truth ruined him.  Action without love is selfish.  We can give all we have to charity, but if its not for love, it’s empty. ¹“If I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but do not have love, I have become a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I have the gift of prophecy, and know all mysteries and all knowledge; and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³ And if I give all my possessions to feed the poor, and if I surrender my body ^[a]to be burned, but do not have love, it profits me nothing” (1 Corinthians 13:1-3 NASB1995). Our efforts cannot get us into heaven. That is why Jesus was sent to die for our sin.  Jesus alone could fulfill the covenant of the 10 Commandments.  This is what Jesus told the people when He said it’s impossible for man, but not for God.  Jesus fulfilled the covenant given to Moses through His perfect obedience, to the point of dying on the cross.  That allowed Jesus to become the perfect sacrifice for our own sin.  Back in the old testament, God would only accept the best offering as a sacrifice for the Israelites’ sin offerings.  God’s sacrifice to atone for all of mankind’s sin would have to be of a level of perfection mankind could not offer.  Enter Jesus.  His death on the cross struck a new covenant with God and mankind.  All who would accept they are a sinner. All who know they can never be good enough to make up for their sin. All who accept Jesus is the only begotten son of God, whose perfect sacrifice, His death on the cross, was to cover our sin.  All who believe because of Jesus’ perfect obedience, God raised Him from the dead to be seated at God’s right hand, where he will intercede to God for us until He comes again in judgement of all creation, will receive eternal life.  The pride in the politician’s heart left him sad and disappointed when the truth was revealed.  The humble heart of the Samaritan woman rejoiced in the truth.  She believed in the truth, and then was able to worship God in spirit. Our lives, we give our lives to God in worship.  ^{16 “}Rejoice always; ¹⁷ pray without ceasing; ¹⁸ in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 NASB1995).  When she received the gift of salivation from Jesus, she could not help but tell the others in town about Him, and what He did for her.  The very people that accused her of all her sinful ways. The very people who forced her to come to the well alone in the middle of the day to avoid their ridicule.  She told them about the Messiah, so even her enemies might be saved.  When we believe the truth that is Jesus the Messiah, and give our life to God in worship, we are then finally able to truly love our neighbors as ourselves.  We can tell them the truth.  I don’t’ want to spend eternity in hell, and I certainly wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy.

I grew up in religion much like the ruler did.  I was raised Catholic; we went to mass every Sunday.  I was an altar boy growing up.  I made all of my sacraments.  I received my first communion and my confirmation.  I even came back as a youth minister for the next group of confirmation students.  Once I went to college I stopped going to church, but I would still have conversations with people at the bars about religion.  I would claim to be a Christian.  I would tell them about God and Jesus.  I would tell them Jesus is real, and that God is real.  I would enjoy the philosophical debates, but I never talked about salvation.  How could I? I didn’t know what that was.  I wasn’t saved.  I didn’t know anything about it.  Knowing God is out there, knowing that Jesus is real will not get you  into heaven.  God’s word tells us 19″You believe that ^[r]God is one. You do well; the demons also believe, and shudder” (James 2:19 NASB1995).  The daemons know full well God and Jesus are real, but without faith in Jesus as Lord you are lost.  It wasn’t until Dec 2012 that I would understand what it means to be saved, to put my faith in Jesus as my Lord and Savior.  I was like the Jews leaders, the Pharisees and the Sadducees. I think most people are.  They have the knowledge of God and Jesus, but have not surrendered to Him and given their life to God through the blood of Jesus Christ.  We would use our knowledge of Jesus and God to belittle people, not to love them and share the truth and grace of God.   Nothing would flash boil my temper faster than a  friend of mine doing something wrong to someone.  I would jump down their throat so fast, and in such a berating way, especially if I had been drinking.  I held such high expectations for the people in my life there was no way they could live up to my “standards.”  I would get so furious on the inside at people for letting me down.  I would go out of my way to make sure people were taken care of, whether it was my business or not.  It would burn me up if that wasn’t reciprocated. I always thought I would find a new girlfriend and new friends that would eventually meet my needs, and that the base issue wasn’t with me. I saw the issues so clearly in all the people around me.  After another failed relationship, reality finally broke me.  This time I realized the problems and issues I had came from me. I realized the brokenness I saw and hated in other people, it was because the same brokenness was in me.  If I couldn’t trust in myself, and I couldn’t find anyone in my life to fill that gap…what could I put my hope in?  In that moment hopelessness filled my heart.  It literally brought me to my knees, and my view of my life fell to pieces. The pride in myself was broken. It left me on the floor of my room crying out in desperation for someone to help me, with uncontrollable tears.  I was there for what felt like hours…just literally crying for someone to help me…but no one was there…I should say something was there.  That night I crawled into bed to sleep, and something did come to help.  It sat down on the corner of my bed.  In the pitch black of my room, I felt it sit down on my bed.  You know the feeling, when someone sits on the corner of the bed.  The bulge from the corner pulled down by the weight and the rise it causes in the middle of the bed.  The shutter is sends though the mattress. The thing that sat on my bed sent a cold up my spine that I’ll never forget.  It was so painful that I curled myself up into the fetal position.  All I could think to do was say Our Fathers until this thing finally left.  The cold pain left with it, and I was able to fall asleep.  I’ve spoken to with many people since then about their testimonies, when they accepted Christ.  Many of them talk about how when they were getting up for an altar call or  to declare faith in Jesus as Lord and savior, they would feel a hand or something literally trying to keep them from getting out of their seats.  I believe Satan makes every attempt to stop us from making the decision to follow Christ.  He will exploit whatever weakness we have to ruin us.  He’ll use sex, money, addiction, anxiety, and any other lie to keep us away from God.  Satan wants you to believe your problems are too big for God and you’re not worthy like the Samaritan woman.  That there is no way God would save you until you’ve got yourself cleaned up, until you mark off the correct to do list like the ruler did.  I believe that thing in my room was Satan’s trick to get me turn to him for help.  One thing I’ve learned in my short walk as a Christian, the first thing that shows up, isn’t usually from God. Pro tip there.  The next morning I woke up, still sad and heart broken over the ending of another relationship, but God showed me something.  When I woke up, my life flashed through my mind.  I remembered every bad situation I had gotten myself in, and saw that God was right there through all of them.  The voice I wouldn’t listen to that would try to stop me from making a bad decision. He was there.  That voice that would tell me go home, but I’d say no I’m having one more drink…it would tell me to go this way and I would say no way I’m going that way!  Every time He was there, through every situation trying to keep me safe.  It was just like the Foot Prints in The Sand Poem. I was trying so hard to find someone I could trust my life with, and He was there. God was the one, but I never saw Him until my pride was broken, until I was humbled.  God was the one. The one to fill the empty spot, that hopeless pit, and that unending thirst. Jesus was the answer, and His living water refreshed my soul.  I’ve found my rock, and now I can see people for who they are, not who I want them to be. The change in me was so deep that when I went to my parents for dinner that Sunday, my mom noticed it as soon as I walked in the door.  She knew I was different. Ever since I’ve been doing my best to be obedient to God. I fail a lot, but His grace keeps me going.  We’re called to be witnesses of God’s glorious ways, just like the Samaritan woman.  This blog is my testimony to what God has done in my life through Jesus Christ.  My testimony protects me from the accusation of Satan, just like the scripture from Revelations on my main page. “…he who accuses them before our God day and night. ¹¹ And they overcame him because of the blood of the Lamb and because of the word of their testimony” (Rev 12:10-11).  When Satan comes to knock me down, I lean of what Jesus did for me.  I lean on the promises of God.  I lean on my gift of salvation, by the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.

Do you know Jesus Christ? The Gospel of Jesus Christ leads us to a cross road.  We must make a decision to live our lives for God or for Satan.  That decision can be made any time or anywhere.  God is everywhere at all times.  He is with you no matter how bad your situation.  I pray you’ll put your trust in God’s forgiveness through Jesus Christ.  Jesus is our righteousness. His blood was shed on the cross to cover our sin.  When God looks at the saved, He doesn’t see our sinful hearts, he sees Jesus’ righteousness.  This prayer is written for everyone who is reading this.  If you’re born again, I pray it will strengthen your faith as you walk and live out your life with God.  For those who want to accept God’s gift of salvation I pray with you as well. I received my gift of salvation in my room. God will meet you where ever you are right now.

“…if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved” (Romans 10:9 NASB).

Heavenly Father, I trust You with my life.  All glory and all hope is with You. You are always faithful and will never fail me. I thank you for Jesus, my savior. His death on the cross and His resurrection into heaven washed my sin away.  He took my place, and His righteous protects me from the evil one.  I will call on the name of the Lord all the days of my life.

Amen